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Is this an inappropriate wedding song?
Plus: Listen to the first episode of the new Love Letters podcast season.
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The first episode of the new season of the Love Letters podcast is out!
It’s about clowns! Sort of!
Listen and enjoy.
I won’t say much – no spoilers – but our guest is a woman named Funmi. Obviously, we enjoyed each other’s company.
I couldn’t stop laughing – and her story about relationships is so uplifting! And instructive!
Find the podcast right here – or wherever you get podcasts.
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P.S. For fans of Reese Witherspoon, rom-coms, and freebies, I’ve got something special for you in this week’s newsletter. Keep reading on.
My aim is … true?
I’ve been thinking about wedding music a lot. Let me get into it for a second.
As I’ve mentioned, The Boston Globe has a new weddings column, The Big Day. In it, Globe writer Rachel Kim Raczka tells stories about the thorny, wonderful path to big commitments.
In one of Rachel’s recent columns, a couple – Allison and Connor – tell the tale of their love … and about how Connor performed the Elvis Costello song “Alison” for his own Allison at their wedding reception. Connor is not a professional singer, but he put his heart into it – in front of everybody!
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Rachel writes: “Two months before their wedding day, he began to learn the lyrics and the melody — while driving, walking the dog, working out at the gym. (On one solo drive to Cape Cod, he remembers listening to the 3-minute 21-second track between 30-40 times.)”
For those who’ve never heard “Alison” by Costello, imagine listening to this 40 times in a row.
Sounds romantic, right? Kind of.
A few readers who commented on the story thought exactly what crossed my mind when I first read it.
One commenter named DOODLEHOFFER said: “Alison” is hardly a love song … and definitely not a wedding song.”
That’s true.
Costello’s 1977 song “Alison” is not sweet at all, in my opinion. Consider these lyrics:
Well I see you’ve got a husband now.
Did he leave your pretty fingers lying
In the wedding cake?
You used to hold him right in your hand.
I’ll bet he took all he could take.
I would not want a new husband to sing those words to me.
There’s also the first stanza, which is even less wedding-appropriate.
Oh it’s so funny to be seeing you after so long, girl.
And with the way you look I understand
That you are not impressed.
But I heard you let that little friend of mine
Take off your party dress.
Yikes.
Even Costello knows this song isn’t romantic. In 2015, he confirmed that the ballad is his fictional take on a bummer situation. (Read all about that in his Vulture article, in which Costello says, “It was a premonition, my fear that I would not be faithful.”)
But here’s the thing. After a second read of Rachel’s column, I decided that “Alison” is an incredibly perfect song for Connor and Allison’s wedding.
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Rachel writes, of why Connor chose to perform the moody tune to the bride, “The blissfully engaged couple heard the Elvis Costello song while in the car about a year into wedding planning. Alli had laughed and teased Connor, who was always quick to belt out a song. ‘Oh, are you going to sing this to me at our wedding?’”
That’s when Connor started to plan the surprise. You bet he was going to sing it.
It wasn’t really about the lyrics; it was all about the memory of the good day in the car.
It was about Connor’s commitment to a comedy bit – and his commitment to his Allison.
That means the song is about something else now.
Is this an inappropriate wedding song?
The feedback …
This is where I’ll say that most of the comments on Rachel’s wedding columns are nice. Some people are a bit … judgemental, mostly about how much money couples spend on big days, and why the Globe is covering weddings at all.
To the naysayers who wonder, “What is the point of this column? … Aren’t there better things to write about?,” I say, let us celebrate CELEBRATIONS!
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So often we’re focusing on the worst moments: Pandemics. Elections. The U.S. healthcare being an absolute shameful trainwreck. (Sorry for editorializing.)
I love what we do at Love Letters because it’s another way of looking at life, and The Globe’s Big Day feature is an extension of that.
To anyone objecting to peoples’ unusual choices or traditions – or a performance of a song that involves upsetting lyrics – I say, I love weird wedding stuff. Let ceremonies be confusing and strange!
Let them include a seemingly romantic ballad that is actually about relationship misery.
Let our odd choices become fantastic stories.
This reminds me: My friend Laura had a weird DJ at her wedding so many years ago. The guy spaced out (or was very stoned?) and accidentally played the 1987 pop hit “Head to Toe” by Lisa Lisa & Cult Jam … like 15 times during the three-hour-ish event.
Every time she spoke to him, asking him to play other songs, he’d follow her instructions – but eventually worked his way back to “Head to Toe” for no understandable reason.
Eventually we all just danced to it, accepting it as the theme of the night. To this day, it makes me so happy. It turned into an anthem about friendship – and about not taking any party too seriously.
Also, “Head to Toe” is still a banger.
If you know of any couples with New England connections who had recent commitment ceremonies/weddings and might want to be featured in The Big Day, tell them to apply. Weird stories are welcome! Traditional ones, too.
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You can also send a question to Love Letters. You might enjoy reading this recent letter about someone who did all the driving in a relationship.
Freebie: A Reese Witherspoon comedy. Enough said.
I promised there’d be free stuff in this newsletter. Today I make good on that.
Boston-area people: We are hosting a Friends of Love Letters preview screening of “You’re Cordially Invited,” a wedding comedy starring Reese Witherspoon and Will Ferrell.
It will be at 7 p.m. on January 23 at a Boston-area theater that has a parking lot and is accessible on the Orange Line.
As a current newsletter subscriber, you’re eligible to win. All you have to do is enter your email on this form, and you’ll be entered in the contest. If you win, you’ll get two seats and instructions with specifics.
It’ll be a fun night – and free.
Last but not least, I’m thinking a lot about Los Angeles for obvious reasons. I don’t know what to say about the losses there, and I’m sure that by the time this letter is sent to you the news will have changed six times over.
All I can say is that I hope we’re all helping in whatever way we can.
I love that place, and it has been a haven for so many people I care about. I’ll leave you with a picture from one of my favorite LA trips.
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My travel partner and I flew a beautiful Baby Yoda flag over the Santa Monica Pier. I hope to be back soon.
— Meredith
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